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   Abortion Debates
     Condescending pro-choicers
       Pro-choice: Is abortion the only "sensible" choice?

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AnnoyedGirl

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Let me give you some background here. Overall I am very liberal. I am pro-choice because I believe that I do not have to right to judge everyone...for example, I do not know 100% if perhaps someone was raped, or is financially destitute, etc. I'd rather the gov't keep abortion legal so that girls who choose can have abortions...than have these girls' babies end up abused or in a trashcan shortly after birth, like in some news articles. America is about choices and freedoms...that is why I am pro-choice.

HOWEVER, I believe that pro-choice means YOU HAVE A CHOICE...not just to have an abortion, but to choose to raise the kid if you want. This ESPECIALLY applies to women who are mature, financially stable, morally opposed to abortion, and ambitious. I'm sick and tired of condescending people telling pregnant women "you should get an abortion, otherwise you're not being sensible...why would you want to throw away those extra years of partying ahead of you?"

Therefore, when it comes to gov't decisions on whether to keep abortion legal or not...I'm pro-choice. I cannot choose for someone else. But when it comes to MY body specifically, I am pro-life. I myself am morally opposed to abortion(although I openly realize and accept that not everyone has the same moral views as me), esp since I have no excuse not to raise a kid...I'm not an uneducated dependent 15-yr-old, but a more mature 25-yr-old that is financially independent.

I hope I am presenting an openminded, well-rounded view on the issue of abortion so far. Now onto my personal story...

When I was 23, I accidentally became pregnant(it was a not-so-funny comedy of errors...condom broke, then the morning after pill failed). I expressed this to my so-called "friends," and to my disgust, about 90% of them told me to get an abortion. When I tried to explain that I was opposed to it, their rebuttal was an explanation on why abortion wasn't "all that evil." But they disregarded MY views and MY choice! These pro-choice people didn't sound very pro-"choice" at all...they sounded very condescending and pro-AnnoyedGirl-getting-an-abortion! My one friend even went so far as to tell me(a Christian) that I should switch to the Unitarian church, because that church supposedly tolerated abortion and then maybe I wouldn't feel so bad about getting it done. I was LIVID! >

Not only did they press their beliefs on me hard, but they disrespected me by judging me to be "unfit" to raise a child. I was NOT a young, vulnerable 16-yr-old without an education or a means to support herself. I was 23 yrs old, held a Bachelor's degree, worked a decent paying job, supported myself independently, had good credit and things to my name, and a more wordly, mature mindset than most other people my age. I did not do drugs. I had partied hard in the past, and partied on occasion, but was more concerned with paying off my car loan early, aiming for a 800 FICO score, and pursuing a job field than getting "crunk".

How oh how could they act as if I was "inadequate" to have a kid?...especially since there were a lot of other people my age having kids that they weren't disapproving of? To add insult to injury, 2 of the people that told me to get an abortion had kids(or one on the way) themselves!...talk about hypocrtical.

Because people were so judgmental, it made me question my own abilities more than necessary. It stressed me out...not just from double-guessing my abilities to be mature and financially stable, but from the lack of support. I guess it's not surprising that a month later, I miscarried.

The whole experience lowered my self esteem. A year and a half later, I'm STILL seething over those peoples' reactions. I didn't express my opinions much back then, mostly because I was a more compliant, submissive person...so when I finally vowed to become more assertive and headstrong, I ended up confronting some of these people months afterwards, and looking like a silly grudgeholder as a result of waiting so long to voice my frustration. To this day, I find myself resenting anyone that makes so much as a light joke to me to the effect of, "Yeah right, like YOU could ever raise a kid." To this day I've wondered why, oh why, these people thought I was too inadequate to raise a baby. Every time I hear of a 22-yr-old girl or some 29-yr-old slutty tattoo guy having a kid, I tend to feel bitter and think, "What do they have that I don't have, that makes it 'ok' in peoples eyes for them to have their kid but I couldn't have mine?"

I just wanted to express how condescending some(but definitely not all) of the pro-abortion/pro-"choice" folks can be. Remember, pro-choice means there's a choice...don't shove the choice of abortion down the necks of the unwilling.

(Edited by AnnoyedGirl 10/3/2007 at 2:29 PM).
 


Posts: 2 | Posted: 2:27 PM on October 3, 2007 | IP
Bombardier-Beetle

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Cheers!!  you sound smart and more like a women to me ;)
 


Posts: 7 | Posted: 5:04 PM on October 3, 2007 | IP
SilverStar

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What about te babies choice?


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Darkside Enterprises were the impossible meets possible.

Tread softy and carry a big stick, preferably an AT4
 


Posts: 681 | Posted: 5:45 PM on October 3, 2007 | IP
AnnoyedGirl

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SilverStar, you bring up another good point for abortion debate...the "baby's choice."  A baby does not choose to be aborted.  That is another reason why personally, I am against getting an abortion.  I wish other people saw things the way I do, but I also realize that it is unrealistic to wish that because every person is different and has a different set of morals, upbringings, and life experiences.

Now while I think that the gov't should give women a choice, I do think they should more tightly regulate the time frame that women are allowed to get an abortion.  For example, ban abortions past say, 2 months and definitely ban partial birth abortions.

Any opinions on my personal experiences?  To be honest, I'm still hurting a bit(psychologically) from that experience and it has turned me against some of my friends.
 


Posts: 2 | Posted: 10:22 AM on October 4, 2007 | IP
SilverStar

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The main problem that I have is the use of abortion as an easy way out. As to rape I am divided, but generaly I go for kill the rapist not the baby. In cases where the mother will die if an abortion is not done, I would say that it is up to her.


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Darkside Enterprises were the impossible meets possible.

Tread softy and carry a big stick, preferably an AT4
 


Posts: 681 | Posted: 7:50 PM on October 5, 2007 | IP
FROGGER

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For pro-choice people I personally believe that those who say "women should be able to choose" I say right back "they already chose when they had made there decision in choosing to have sex."


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Fully<br>Rely<br>On<br>God<br>G<br>E<br>R
 


Posts: 8 | Posted: 10:12 PM on February 29, 2008 | IP
    
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