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     Please help me,should I abort?

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God_Is_Sleeping

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Hello I have found this place on google and hope to get some opinions on my rather unusual situation.

I am 20 years old and married to a man who often has to work away around the country so I am frequently left alone at home.  I do love my husband but to be honest I married him very young (only 17) and he was a way out of an unhappy home life.  He is 25 years older than me and doesn't want me to work because he thinks it would be an insult on him if his wife works.

Anyway, my problem is that I am pregnant and I don't think the child is his.  I have slept with an ex-boyfriend, once or twice and the dates just fall right for when I was with him and not my husband.  Of course my husband wouldn't think about the dates and he has assumed that the baby is his.  I am now 20 weeks along and have yet to be seen by a doctor because, to be honest, I have been burying my head in the sand and hoping it would all go away.  Now, however, I am beginning to show and can feel the occasional kick and it has sent me in to a panic.  There is no way I can have this child.  What if it doesn't look like my husband?  The only way out for me is to have an abortion and I know I am running out of time because I only have until 24 weeks to get it done.

I would be interested to know if anyone here has had an abortion and how they felt about it.  Was it painful?  Will I need to stay overnight in hospital?  

Many thanks for your help, I am going out of my mind here.  I have tried to speak to a friend of mine but she looked at me like I was a monster when I mentioned abortion and we haven't spoken since  
 


Posts: 1 | Posted: 12:32 PM on June 18, 2007 | IP
EMyers

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What does the baby's father think?


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"Thou believest that God is one; thou does well: the demons also believe, and shudder." James 2:19 - Belief is never enough.
 


Posts: 1287 | Posted: 4:58 PM on June 18, 2007 | IP
SilverStar

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The only time that an abortion should be considered, is in rape, or health situations


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Darkside Enterprises were the impossible meets possible.

Tread softy and carry a big stick, preferably an AT4
 


Posts: 681 | Posted: 12:33 AM on June 27, 2007 | IP
richbrmly

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A man or a woman’s life is very dependent on their mate. In marriage a partner places trust in the other that their life is safe when sleeping with them.  A family must be defended and it’s the duty of all partners in a family to do just that; defend the home. Sleeping with someone outside the partnership is a direct attack on the family. Basically; your partner is under attack by you.  You need to wake up and realize the implications of your actions. If you have sex, you could clearly develop a pregnancy.  When your mate has relations with you, his life in your hands and you need to consider the implications that has on him. What you need is counseling by trained professionals.  If your income is limited you may have to seek that at a family counseling center to begin with.  You are clearly in need of family counseling, I would highly suggest you seek it and start making a better person in yourself especially before you start making a person that will have to face life and be molded by your actions.


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Richard
 


Posts: 2 | Posted: 08:40 AM on August 4, 2007 | IP
superman1575

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I feel that killing a life to clean u a mistake is almost evil. I am not typically a pro-life person, but just to have an abortion because you are scared of the consequences of your actions? And what if you did abort the baby, and it was actually ur husbands? Wold you be able to live with yourself knowing that you killed your child because you were a coward? It also bothers me that one of your main concerns was wether it hurt. You are selfish enough to murder too avoid responsability for an action, and then your worried about the physical pain.
I hope you read this in time to do right thing. Keep mind no matter who the father is, its still YOUR child regardless.


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Fight the battles that need to be fought.
 


Posts: 6 | Posted: 01:13 AM on August 30, 2007 | IP
SilverStar

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I believe that for every action there is a consequence. it may be positive or it may be negative. In your case an abortion would be to avoid a consequence. That is wrong.



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Darkside Enterprises were the impossible meets possible.

Tread softy and carry a big stick, preferably an AT4
 


Posts: 681 | Posted: 01:54 AM on September 9, 2007 | IP
creationest6

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don't abort. u would be taking a life. the guilt would be life long.


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"If God wanted us to be concerned for the plight of toads, he would have made them cute and fluffy."

-Dave Barry
 


Posts: 451 | Posted: 10:15 PM on October 18, 2007 | IP
SilverStar

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Taking a life is never right, just in self defence.


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Darkside Enterprises were the impossible meets possible.

Tread softy and carry a big stick, preferably an AT4
 


Posts: 681 | Posted: 5:02 PM on October 19, 2007 | IP
creationest6

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(nods head rapidly) I agree.


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"If God wanted us to be concerned for the plight of toads, he would have made them cute and fluffy."

-Dave Barry
 


Posts: 451 | Posted: 6:24 PM on October 21, 2007 | IP
adoptionNOTabortion

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Oh Goodness! Please, please don't consider abortion! If you don't think your husband will forgive you, at least give the baby up for adoption! Why should this little innocent baby suffer for your mistake? Especially at 20 weeks! Your baby can definitely feel pain now! Maybe your calculations are off...what if the baby IS his! Even if not, can you continue on with your life, first, knowing you cheated on your husband, and second, knowing that you killed an innocent baby? And then act like nothing happened? I say killed and not aborted because, you are 20 weeks!!! Look at any pictures online and it will show you how big the baby is and that it can hear and feel pain! Please, please don't consider abortion! I can't believe anyone would do an abortion up to 24 weeks. That is just horrifying!
 


Posts: 5 | Posted: 4:23 PM on November 11, 2007 | IP
SilverStar

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One of the options my birthmother had was abortion, thankfully see chose adoption. Otherwise I wouldn't be typing right now.


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Darkside Enterprises were the impossible meets possible.

Tread softy and carry a big stick, preferably an AT4
 


Posts: 681 | Posted: 7:09 PM on November 22, 2007 | IP
Toast

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No, it's not a good idea to make an unborn child pay for your mistakes.
Abortion is a short term and "short sighted" solution which will leave emotional issues in its wake until the day you die.
 


Posts: 1 | Posted: 2:45 PM on December 15, 2007 | IP
forfunt1

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It may seem like the advice of other people will help you sort through your confusion about what to do; It won't.

There are many replies that read as though your question was not even heard. You are not asking for a logical solution to an emotional challenge, and so it is not fair for the other users in this forum to respond to you with fear for reasonable uncertainty.

I do not know what will happen to you as a consequence of having an abortion, and I do not think there is a person in the world that can tell you with certainty. Don't be afraid of any of the "what will happen if I do the wrong thing" because there is  no such thing as wrong anywhere in the universe.

This is an opportunity for you to listen to your heart, and feel the voice of emotion as it guides you. Forget fear, forget reason, and forget the programs in your mind that society uses to manipulate your actions for "wrong" or "right". As long as you have feeling, you will be alright.

Remember that this is your life as much as everybody else.
Good luck.


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-yo
 


Posts: 163 | Posted: 4:55 PM on December 16, 2007 | IP
forfunt1

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I guess I'm too late anyway :-(


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-yo
 


Posts: 163 | Posted: 4:56 PM on December 16, 2007 | IP
law84

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it sounds as though you have made up your mind to abort the baby.  I am currently pregnant at the moment and going through a stressful time deciding whether to have the baby or not because i dont know if its the right time.  If you have gone back to your ex which i have done before you are not in love with your husband and you need to get out of the relationship as its not healthy.  I know its hard but you need to decide what is best for you and your life.


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law84
 


Posts: 2 | Posted: 9:57 PM on January 9, 2008 | IP
preciouslife

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I noticed the last post was in January and you probably already made up your mind. But regardless, you should visit www.abort73.com. It's good to be educated.
 


Posts: 2 | Posted: 12:50 AM on February 22, 2008 | IP
    
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